Author: sevencatsandcounting

Oh, thank Dog that it’s finally fire season…

…after the unbearably long, hot summer during which Human Mommy inexplicably refused to turn down the outdoor thermostat!

—Cosmo

Are you finally awakening from your nighttime slumber, Human Mommy?

Good. You have much work to do, both at work and more importantly for me.

—Amber

Know what would make that last, delicious bite of meatloaf taste even better, Human Daddy?

Sharing.

—Cosmo

If I can’t go outside, you can’t go downstairs, Human Mommy.

Rules are rules.

—Luna

My Human Mommy procured this Cat-sized couch for me when she replaced my old, beloved full-size couch with a newer model, which understandably upset me greatly as I had not authorized such a radical change to my environment.

After nearly a month of ignoring its existence, I have decided that I quite like my new Cat-size couch.

The new full-size couch continues to disappoint, a fact that I mention to my Human Mommy frequently.

—Louie, Senior Lap Muffin Correspondent

No, I’m not working out yet, Human Mommy. Can’t you see that I’m still awake?

Nap cycling only works asleep.

—Lily

Feeling anti-social?

Curl up tight and refuse to interact.

—Amber

It’s critical to grab a spot in line early…

…since there’s always a dinner rush.

—Sunny, et al

Is your most lackluster employee performing even less lustrously than usual? Time for a performance review.

Digging in your claws is optional but highly recommended.

—Amber

Why am I glaring at you, Human Mommy?

The fact that you have to ask…

…only displeases me further.

—Amber