Daily Feline and Canine Wisdom

When I first arrived in the Homestead, I was very cautious around the Woofies, given their loudness, relative clumsiness, and humongous size.

I quickly learned that the Woofies are pretty chill, especially Uncle Sunny.

Except when there’s a thunderstorm.

—Neo

Sometimes the biggest Doggo needs the biggest bed…

…for the biggest nap.

—Cosmo

As an undeniable Dreamboat, I have to dedicate an enormous amount of time to self-care…

…and also to pondering how handsome I am.

—Apollo

Cosmo, the biggest Woofie, is on the floor, whereas I am enjoying the beloved Rainbow Donut.

This is as it should be.

—Neo

As Human Mommy’s personal trainer, I’ve come to the conclusion that she has no hope of ever catching even the slowest of slow Mousies, no matter how hard she works out.

I still encourage her, though.

Exercise tends to make Human Mommy hungry and if she’s hungry, she’s more likely to go down to the kitchen where the Temptations are stored.

—Apollo

Finished my Upper Paw workout, and I’ve still got some gas left in the tank.

Strongly considering doubling up with my Lower Paws or perhaps some Tail Cardio.

—Apollo

The only thing to do after brunch…

…is to take a post-brunch, digestive nap.

—Cosmo and Xena

Huh! I thought it was my turn to sign-in for the Guard Dog shift…

…but Apollo tells me he’s already got things in Paw.

—Sunny

Nothing to see here, Human Mommy! We are absolutely fine.

Now why don’t you head downstairs to the kitchen to prepare a nice post-training snack for us?

—Apollo and Neo

No, Human Mommy, I’m not always in the kitchen.

I just make a point of being here when you’re here because I know I have a 95% chance of receiving a treat or an extra meal if I deploy my Kitten eyes.

99% if I sing the aria of starvation, popularized by my Spiritual Father Darth Vader.

—Neo