Big Data

Since the beginning of Feline/Human Cohabitation, we Cats have been collecting data on what you Humans do in the bathroom.

My Human is showering. I must keep track of the time, the water usage, and temperature then run all these data points through a complex equation that proves licking oneself is more efficient and more civilized.

Then I must upload my findings to the North American Feline Meta-Data Human Bathroom Usage Cloud-Based SharePaw Site.

Data analysis is exhausting.

–Louie, Senior Lap Muffin Contributor

Senior Royal

Why you are here, Human, eyeing my bed so coveteously?

You say you are stuck in my palace…

Social distancing, you say…

In that case, kindly distance yourself both socially and physically from my bed.

It is time for the Queen’s mid-morning nap.

–Lexie, Guest Contributor*

*Does your Cat (or Woofie) want to be a Guest Contributor? Send a picture to finneganthekitten@gmail.com.