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Code red, Human Mommy!! The Kibble bowls are almost empty, except for a few loose Kibbles that we cannot eat because then the bowls would be ENTIRELY EMPTY!!

Initiate Emergency Refill Procedures IMMEDIATELY!!!

—Luna, Darth Vader, and Lily

The best part about a snowy day…

…is curling up in a warm spot and binging Birdie TV!

—Lily

There are many ways to pose for the paparazzi.

If you’re a pretty, prim and proper Calico, nothing beats a classic loaf with your front paws and tail curled daintily just so.

—Jelly, Guest Contributor

Yes, Human Mommy, we know there are two full bowls of Kibble behind us, but we don’t feel like Kibble right now.

Kindly fetch us something more appealing like Temptations or Tuna or the hot-smoked Salmon preferred by Louis Catorze.

—Darth Vader and Luna

OMC, I hope Human Daddy tunes in to March Madness!

This basketball thing is absolutely riveting!

—Apollo

I had a ton of stuff on my to-do list this afternoon…

…but I guess I’m not doing anything because my beloved Stella has chosen me for her Chin/Cheek Rest.

—Sunny

For Cat’s Sake!

Can’t a pretty, grey Tabby get a moment of privacy when she’s cleansing her snowy white, thigh-high stockings?!

—Luna

Is your Human employee yet again engaging in too loud clickety-clackety typing?

Show your displeasure by assuming aggrieved Loaf position.

—Luna

When you have a magnificent tail, there’s no need to flaunt it.

Simply drape your tail casually over the side of your Cat Tree and let the compliments pour in.

—Lando, Guest Contributor

I’m a fierce, brave, capable Warrior Princess.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate protective cuddles with my Papa Cosmo.

—Xena