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Oh, Big Sis Luna, do you really have to hiss at me all the time? Can’t we be friends?

No, Little Upstart, I am not in the market for new friends and your presence peeves me.

—Apollo and Luna

Behold my toe beans, Humans!

If you reach for a tummy rub, I may reveal even more of them or I may scratch your hand to bits.

One or the other.

—Apollo

I’m a good Chin Rest, but I’ve got to admit that Xena’s best.

There’s just something about her shape and her dark, silky coat.

—Sunny

Human Mommy takes a lackadaisical approach to housework that is frequently advantageous to us Cats.

It’s just lovely, for example, when new comfortable beds of laundry appear, either on their way to or returning from the washing machine.

—Lily

For reasons known only to himself, Human Daddy sometimes likes to put his caps on my head.

I wish he’d stop doing this. I’m so embarrassed in front of the Baby Meowie.

—Cosmo

It’s happening again, Humans.

Do something now!

—Darth Vader

It has recently come to my attention that I’m in charge of everything, both at home and at work.

So of course I am occupying the fancy office chair.

Human Mommy, you can find a spot on the floor.

—Apollo

I hope I’m imagining it, but the furs on the back of my neck are standing straight up.

I think I’m being stalked.

—Cosmo

I don’t often serve as a Woofie Chin Rest, but sometimes I make an exception.

Stella is my favorite Woofie and she’s also my Co-Void.

—Darth Vader

The Big Cats tell me that a healthy diet and plenty of exercise aren’t enough to grow up big and strong.

I’ve also got to stretch regularly.

They’re definitely right! I’ve gotten at least half an inch longer since I started.

—Apollo