Daily Feline Wisdom

I’m keep trying to make friends with Big Sis Luna…

…but every time I approach her, she hisses and says some truly unkind things.

Maybe I’ll have better luck with the hanging plant.

—Apollo

Yes, Human Mommy, I am sulking on my pretty pink blanket. Why am I sulking?

Because of the annoying, bouncy, pouncy interloper who is undergoing a major growth spurt but, incredibly, seems to become even bouncier and pouncier as he ages.

Why did you do this to me, Human Mommy?!

—Luna

Hello Rope Dragon! I will nibble on you or maybe even slay you.

I haven’t quite decided yet.

—Apollo

Occasionally, your Human Employees may try to overdo it at work.

As their Cat Manager, you must put a stop to this.

—Apollo

This cardboard box lid is most excellent, Humans.

I trust that you will not make the mistake of placing it in the recycling bin.

—Lily

Stella and I are seriously considering joining our forces as a Super Void.

Absorbing even an iota of the bouncy, pouncy Kitten’s energy would benefit the entire homestead, if not the universe.

—Darth Vader

What do you mean there’s nothing in this bag for me, Human Mommy?

No tuna, no chicken, no chilled, fresh cream, no NOTHING?!

You’ll be hearing from my lawyer.

—Louie, Guest Contributor

Are you plotting world domination again, Apollo, or are you just planning your next pounce on my feet?

Why can’t I be doing both, Human Mommy?

—Apollo

I think you have potential as a Guard Meowie, Little Apollo, but you’ve got to speak up.

It’s our job to tell the intruding Squirrels who’s in charge!

—Xena

Papa Cosmo! I think I see something outside the window. Should we go investigate?

You go along, Little Xena. I’m sure you can handle whatever it is.

I, on the other paw, am overdue for a much needed nap.

—Xena and Cosmo