Daily Feline Wisdom

When I’m not out waging mighty battles…

…I enjoy sitting on my lovely throne, befitting a Warrior Princess.

—Xena

Besides being Human Mommy’s manager and academic dean, I am also her personal trainer.

Pick up the pace, Human Mommy! You’ll never catch a Mousie at that speed, let alone a Birdie.

—Amber

Human Mommy has returned to grad school, so in addition to being her Cat Manager on weekdays, I must now be her Cat Dean, too.

Human Mommy’s professional and academic success depends entirely on me.

—Amber

My Human Mommy took me to a totally unnecessary, preventative VET visit and then stuffed me into a stiff cone to prevent me from performing the necessary licking of the patch that was unnecessarily shaved to allow for the unnecessary blood draw.

Fortunately, my Human Mommy saw the error in her ways and replaced the stiff cone with an altogether fetching flower, which doubles as a comfy nap pillow.

I am still peeved, though. Very peeved.

—Louie, Senior Lap Muffin Contributor

My Human Mommy took me to a totally unnecessary, preventative VET visit and then stuffed me into a stiff cone to prevent me from performing the necessary licking of the patch that was unnecessarily shaved to allow for the unnecessary blood draw.

Fortunately, my Human Mommy saw the error in her ways and replaced the stiff cone with an altogether fetching flower, which doubles as a comfy nap pillow.

I am still peeved, though. Very peeved.

—Louie, Senior Lap Muffin Contributor

Human Daddy finally installed the AC unit in the window to prevent his beloved Hound from melting over the coming months.

Thank Dog for AC…

…and Thank Dog for Human Daddy!

—Cosmo

Liquefaction process initiated.

Kindly do not disturb the melt.

—Luna

I see we are dining al fresco tonight, Human Daddy.

You know what makes food taste even better than fresh, balmy, late spring air?

Sharing with your beloved, starving Hound.

—Cosmo

I see you are distributing peanuts to the squirrels and birdies.

Where is my midafternoon snack?

—Darth Vader

Did you say or think the word “snacks” OR are you thinking about snacks now because we mentioned them?

Please, continue this train of thought.

We are in favor of snacks.

—Darth Vader and Cosmo