Daily Feline Wisdom

The Wonder Twins are not dummies. We know better than to look directly at the eclipse.

So why won’t you let us OUT?!

—Finnegan

Lily says that I can have her Trout as the ‘Nip stuffing has staled.

Still smells Nippy to me. Lily’s loss, my gain.

—Stella

I see we’re having chicken salad for dinner, Human Mommy.

Kindly share the good part and not the vegetable part.

—Cosmo

Human Employees have an unfortunate habit of celebrating the weekend early and slacking off a bit.

Don’t allow this!

Sit on your employees if necessary to maintain at least a semblance of productivity.

—Amber

How many pieces are in that bucket, Human Daddy?

And most importantly, how many are we getting?

—Cosmo, et. al.

Now is not the time for photos, paparazzi.

Now is the time for snoozing.

—Darth Vader

It can be rather cozy to curl up with Darth Vader…

…particularly when his scary Murder Mittens are pointing the other way.

—Sunny

You don’t have to be a sociable Cat at all times.

It’s quite all right to engage in restorative ME time,

—Amber

Human Mommy, Amber and I have voiced our concerns with your daily shower habit multiple times, yet you persist in standing under water and dousing yourself with products that make you smell not like you.

Kindly cease and desist from this barbaric practice.

—Cosmo

The ‘Nip in my trout has gone stale, Human Mommy. Kindly procure me a fresh ‘Nip-filled fish from the Amazon pond.

Same day or overnight shipping.

This is an emergency.

—Lily