Daily Feline and Canine Wisdom

I have always wanted minions.

Pity they’re all Woofies. I guess you have to work with what’s available.

–Lily

When you go on a date, it’s important to be attuned to any red flags.

For example, my date insisted on a seafood place even though she knows I prefer brisket.

And she’s hogging the shrimp! TBH, I don’t like shrimp–it’s the principle of the thing.

–Louie, Senior Lap Muffin Correspondent

This Monday feels like a Monday.

Might as well give up now.

–Lily

I’m a Warrior Princess, a Fearsome Guard Dog, and I may just have the best Sniffer in the whole pack.

Yet sometimes I feel like the other Doggoes just see me as a Chin Rest.

–Xena

Human Mommy, your face is very red after your jog and you appear to be foaming from your mouth a little bit.

Should I call the Vet for you?

–Sunny

Oh, must you use the flash, Human Mommy?!

The deepest, darkest shadow is obviously me.

Illumination destroys the ambiance.

–Darth Vader

3 out of 4 Doggoes are on the bed.

1 of 3 Doggoes is facing the pillows. 2 of 3 Doggoes are facing the foot of the bed.

Little Xena is the Margin of Error, since we don’t know which way she’s facing.

(See?! We told you we could do your job, Human Mommy.)

–Sunny, Stella, and Cosmo

Do I want to come in or stay out?

Ultimately, it depends on the snack situation.

–Phelps

This is no longer a chair.

Now it is a throne because I have installed my Royal Self upon it.

–Lily

Why are you panting like that, Sunny? Did you overdo it on Zoomies or something?

No, Xena, I’m actually hyperventilating. There’s a thunderstorm and I really, REALLY don’t like that!

–Xena and Sunny