Do not let your Humans become materialistic by purchasing the same materials over and over again.
Tell them you won’t chew the new futon mattress they purchased to replace the inexplicably damaged futon mattress they purchased to replace the couch you allegedly ate.
It’s for your Humans’ own good and the good of their wallets and thus the good of your treat supply, even if it’s not 100% true.
–Cosmo and Stella


whoever thinks they are futon mattresses consumers needs to remember about the presumption of innocence (innocent until proven guilty) 🙂
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Thank you for your support! We are innocent of any and all furniture destruction. Woofs and Wags, Cosmo and Stella
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Well, even if someone sees you ‘destroying furniture’ the explanation is: it’s either a set up or you’re just making improvements (I am well trained, my lifetime of multi-pets household has finally paid off)
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True words! Humans just don’t understand our advanced design aesthetics. Not that we’d ever chew anything. Not us… Woofs and Wags, Cosmo and Stella
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If somebody uses a futon they should know that when you do not use a futon it is rolled up and put away where no dogs reach it … you are totally innocenct. How should you know that a futon that has not been rolled up is NOT meant for destruction?
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Indeed! It’s not like our Humans put signage on it instructing us not to chew and the cats not to scratch. If only they’d taken the time to roll up the futon or, at the very least, post official signage.
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That should be your story and you should stick to it!
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The new futon appears to be pet-approved. The old one was probably used by cats and smelled like tuna. No wonder it was chewed up. BTW, have you seen that movie, Marley?
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Thank you! We have not seen Marley, but our Human Mommy has. She says we’re not allowed to see it before we are a little older because she thinks Marley could be a bad influence on us. Woofs and Wags, Cosmo and Stella
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I can’t fault your reasoning and I totally believe you-the same way I believe Charlie never clawed the wallpaper behind the sofa. The shreds between her toes were just paper….
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Totally just paper! Besides, if the wallpaper is behind the sofa, it’s not like you can see it anyway. Woofs and Wags, Cosmo and Stella
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Sound advice. 🙂
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stella & cosmo….sew…. we R guessin de
“naybor dawg got in while everee one waz at werk” storee ……
dinna hold water huh ….coz de naybor dawgs mite get in AGAIN & chew said futon….just coz they can ♥♥♥
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So….did the sofa taste good?
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We only “allegedly” ate the couch. It was “allegedly” delicious. Woofs and Wags, Stella and Cosmo
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I had an alleged burger for supper last night. 🙂
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