Happy Black Cat Day! Stroke a glossy, glorious house panther today to show your appreciation.
–Darth Vader
Handsomeness Sleep
Just as girls need their beauty sleep, guys need their handsomeness sleep.
–Phelps
Pull Yourself Back Up
Did you accidentally roll off the otoman while posing for photos? Don’t be embarrassed–just pull yourself back up.
–Lily
Lengthening Oneself
Do you wish that your body were longer? Start lengthening yourself with regular stretches.
–Quicksilver
Waiting
If you are very hungry in the morning, you may want to gallop at full speed downstairs to the kitchen. It is, however, better to wait on the landing and stare at your human. There’s no point in arriving in the kitchen without an opposable thumbed human in tow.
–Amber, Finnegan and Darth Vader
Saying “I love you”
No need to say “I love you.” Simply sit on the people you love and dig your claws into their flesh.
–Phelps
Costumes
Halloween is just around the corner. If you are not fortunate enough to be a glossy black cat, it is time to start planning your costume.
–Darth Vader
Minimalism
A good home needs only three spaces: a bedroom, a bathroom and a kitchen. Everything else is superfluous.
–Charlie
Invisibility
Do you need a long, uninterrupted nap? Find a pillow that matches your fur and curl up there. Your pillow camouflage will make you all but invisible to humans who have an annoying habit of skritching your ears and disrupting your dreams just when you are about to catch a bird.
–Quicksilver
Shoes
You can appreciate a good pair of heels even if you cannot wear them yourself.
–Finnegan
