You will know when you find true love. Don’t question it. Your heart knows.
This position only looks precarious to Humans who lack a catlike sense of balance. Poor Humans!
Find your Color Palette and adhere to it. For example, if you have dark grey fur and white paws, you are probably a “winter.” You look your best curled up on a light grey background. Be sure curl your snowy paws so that they pop.
When you arrive at a pond, drink from it. Hydration is important. If a goldfish arrives in your mouth, eat it. Omega 3 is important, too.
When you really, really, really want something, like spaghetti, pretend to be asleep. Spring into action at the propitious moment when the spaghetti is unguarded because the Humans believe you to be deep in dreamland.
–Cosmo and Darth Vader
If your Humans tell you that they have run out of kitty treats, don’t stop begging. Au contraire, send your Humans on a guilt trip by intensifying your gaze and letting your meow warble with hunger. At least they’ll feel bad and at best they’ll crack open a can of tuna to apologize.
Kiss your beloved as often as you can. There’s no such thing as too many kisses.
Nothing compares to flopping down and rolling about on the newly thawed sidewalk on an unseasonably warm March day.
Spring is almost here. Venture outside the fort to get some fresh air and to reestablish your dominance as the neighborhood watch cats.
–Phelps and Darth
Don’t worry if your favorite lap seems smaller than it used to. You’re still a lapdog so long as your Human Daddy says you fit.