Nothing adorns a green room so perfectly as a green-eyed girl with a lush spider plant.
–Lily
Too Close
Meowies don’t like it when you get too close to them. Don’t worry if you forget this rule–the Meowies will remind you.
–Stella
Toppings
Pepperoni or sausage? Mushrooms or peppers?
Whatever your pizza topping preference, your Cat is the ultimate pizza box topper.
–Amber
Champion
You can’t become a champion of flexibility overnight. To become a champion, you need talent, practice and a performance enhancing drug like catnip.
–Lily
Parents won’t always get your style
Do your parents not understand your style? For example, are they constantly telling you to fix your ears because they’re inside-out?
Don’t pay them any mind. They mean well, but they’re too old to know that it’s trendy to expose the pink insides of your floppy ears to match your pretty pink collar.
–Stella
Be Discrete
If you’re a handsome Cat and you have an irresistible urge to clean your privates while outside, be sure to position yourself strategically behind a plant to prevent the smartphone-wielding Human paparazzi from catching you in a compromising position.
–Phelps
No Room
As Cats, sometimes you have to deliver uncomfortable truths to your Humans, such as the fact that there is no room for them on the bed.
–Amber, Quicksilver, Finnegan, Darth Vader and Phelps
Queuing up for Kibble
Sometimes it can be hard to tell if a Cat is in line for the kibble or not, particularly if she’s a Millennial Kitty, facing the wrong way, stretched out nonchalantly as if she’s not even hungry, caught up in texting or pokemoning or whatever else she’s doing with her snowy white paw.
Cut in front. Age before beauty.
–Phelps
Whatcha doing Mommy?
Humans tend to be pretty predictable, doing the same things over and over again, day in and day out.
Sometimes, though, Human Mommy will do something new, something you’ve never ever seen her do before in the 10 months you’ve been living with her.
When this happens, it’s okay to stare. Try to figure what she’s doing, why she’s doing it and, most importantly, if it can benefit you like her cooking does.
–Cosmo and Stella
Take the Fifth
Are your Humans home unexpectedly early? Is the larger Woofie inexplicably immobilized? Are you sitting pretty on top of his crate?
Take the Fifth.
–Amber
Daily Feline and Canine Wisdom 