The Woofies are big enough, Humans, bigger than enough, too big, really, more equine than canine.
They’ve obviously had enough to eat. Why do you keep buying them more cans of wet food?
For the Love of Cat, how big do you want them to get?! Clydesdale-size??!!
–Darth Vader
Sometimes Humans say nonsensical things. For example, Human Mommy just called us a pair of lovebugs. We understand “pair” and we understand “love,” but what about us is bug-like?
–Cosmo and Stella
Well, for one thing, Woofies, you “bug” me all the time, especially you, Cosmo, especially you.
–Luna
Happy Father’s Day, Human Daddy!
You’re the best Daddy ever!
You’re just as much fun as the day we met.
–Cosmo
What do you mean, Human Mommy, that I must get out of this fun, crinkly plastic bag RIGHT NOW lest it smother me?
Did you ever think that you might be the one smothering me with your killjoy, rigid rules?
–Luna
Heading out on the town this fine Friday evening?
Wherever you go, whatever you do, don’t walk.
Stalk.
–Phelps
Bet you wish you could tuck your front paws so adorably, Humans!
Well, you can’t. Your phsyionomy doesn’t permit it and, even if it did, you need to be covered in silky, feline fur for this position to work.
Feel free to console yourselves by drinking in my adorableness.
–Luna
Choose your bachelor pad wisely. If you like a bit of action, don’t move too far out to the country–youthful Kittens will keep you young.
On the other paw, be sure that your pad is protected from the hurly-burly of the youngsters’ catnip-fueled disputes. Kittens may do fine with a mere 18 hours of sleep daily, but you require a minimum of 20 hours.
Most importantly, make sure that your pad is in close proximity to the best place in the house, i.e. the kitchen.
–Charlie
What’s that, Humans? Tuesday, you say?
If I didn’t wake up for Monday, what makes you think that Tuesday will be any different?
Now go away. Try back on Hump Day.
Or, let’s be honest here, try back on Friday afternoon in time for happy hour.
Those Meowgaritas are not going to drink themselves, after all.
–Lily
We Dogs highly recommend this WordPress story! It made our Monday.
Woofs and Wags, Cosmo and Stella
All naps are good, but some are better than others. For example, although I appreciate my mid-morning and mid-afternoon naps, my early afternoon nap is my favorite.
What’s that Humans? It’s Monday and you have to “work”? “Work” precludes naps, you say?
“Work” sounds dreadful.
–Luna
Daily Feline Wisdom 