DIY project, Humans? Don’t expect me to help but I sure can supervise.
–Darth Vader
No Pictures
No photos, papparrazzi!
Can’t a Celebricat get a moment of privacy from you cellphone wielding Humans?!
Did you not hear me? NO PICTURES!!
If you don’t put that cellphone down IMMEDIATELY I’ll take it from you!
–Phelps
Darkening
This sheet is still whitish, but I am definitely darkening it with my midnight fur.
Just a few more weeks and it will be perfect.
What’s that? My Humans will toss it in the wash before I achieve my aesthetic vision of a sheet that glistens like the Hope Diamond?
Pffft… If they haven’t done it yet, what makes you think they’ll do it soon?
–Darth Vader
Damsel in Distress
Uh oh! This cardboard box I launched myself into is much too narrow and too deep. I’m stuck.
HELP!
I’ll save you, Luna! What do you want me to do? Topple your box prison, gnaw through the cardboard or a combination of both?
–Luna and Cosmo
They grow up too fast…
Woofies grow up too fast. That is why it is essential to train them when they are relatively small, preferably smaller than you, in order to instill a proper respect for Cats in them.
In the Woofies’ imagination, I will always be a Lion.
–Quicksilver
Big Enough
The Woofies are big enough, Humans, bigger than enough, too big, really, more equine than canine.
They’ve obviously had enough to eat. Why do you keep buying them more cans of wet food?
For the Love of Cat, how big do you want them to get?! Clydesdale-size??!!
–Darth Vader
Lovebugs
Sometimes Humans say nonsensical things. For example, Human Mommy just called us a pair of lovebugs. We understand “pair” and we understand “love,” but what about us is bug-like?
–Cosmo and Stella
Well, for one thing, Woofies, you “bug” me all the time, especially you, Cosmo, especially you.
–Luna
Happy Father’s Day
Happy Father’s Day, Human Daddy!
You’re the best Daddy ever!
You’re just as much fun as the day we met.
–Cosmo
Smother
What do you mean, Human Mommy, that I must get out of this fun, crinkly plastic bag RIGHT NOW lest it smother me?
Did you ever think that you might be the one smothering me with your killjoy, rigid rules?
–Luna
Stalk
Heading out on the town this fine Friday evening?
Wherever you go, whatever you do, don’t walk.
Stalk.
–Phelps
Daily Feline and Canine Wisdom 