Well, hello there.
Congratulations on your order of an Amazonian Apex Predator.
Now where’s my dinner?
–Luna
Spring Looks
Oversized boxes are fine for the winter…
…but the spring calls for slimmer looks.
–Luna
Boxes sans stuff…
Love the boxes, Amazon, but Human Mommy orders way too much stuff.
Can we get the boxes without stuff?
–Luna
Scissors
Scissors, Humans? Are you kidding me? This box you ordered has been on the floor for weeks. It is now my bed, perfectly contoured to my furry body.
I bet you don’t even remember what’s in it.
–Lily
Too much stuff
Do your Humans have too much stuff? Do they keep accumulating more stuff even though they have more than enough?
Feel free to give them a hard time, but not too hard because you don’t really want them to stop accumulating stuff as that would mean no more new boxes.
–Amber
Apologies
Sometimes you have to apologize.
For example, you should apologize after you chew the back plates off of the supposedly indestructible dinosaur Human Mommy procured for you 2 days ago on Amazon Prime.
Sorry pink Stegosaurus.
Sorry Couch.
Sorry Futon mattress.
Sorry decorative wood trim, various shoes, wooden coffee table, etc.
You were all delicious, if it makes it any better, which it probably doesn’t.
Sorry for your extinction.
–Cosmo
Daily Feline Wisdom 