Ever wake up only to feel that there is a large, uninvited presence behind you? You could be right or you could still be dreaming.
Either way, it’s probably best just to fall back asleep and hope that it doesn’t snore or slobber.
–Darth Vader
Let them on your bed…
It doesn’t hurt to let your Humans on your bed once in awhile as their legs make for excellent pillows. Just don’t let them become territorial.
It’s your bed not theirs.
–Quicksilver
Helping Out
Sure, Kitties, Humans are there to serve us. We all know that.
Still, you can demonstrate your magnamity by lending a helping paw when the Humans try, ineffectually, to perform routine household tasks, like changing the sheets on our bed.
Silly Humans! How on earth do they expect us Kitties to sleep soundly and awaken refreshed without a fine sheen of feline fur on our sheets?
–Luna
Happy Monday!
Happy Monday, Humans! Don’t feel too bad about abandoning us to go to the mysterious place you call work.
Our bed is a lot more comfortable without you taking up so much space.
–Finnegan, Quicksilver, Luna and Darth Vader
Scissors
Scissors, Humans? Are you kidding me? This box you ordered has been on the floor for weeks. It is now my bed, perfectly contoured to my furry body.
I bet you don’t even remember what’s in it.
–Lily
Luxuriating
Don’t be jealous, Humans. Unless you are a silky, shiny House Panther, there’s no way you will ever be able to luxuriate this well.
Feel free to imitate me, though, to the best of your limited abilities.
–Darth Vader
The Biggest Bed
Is this your biggest bed, Humans? A bit tight, isn’t it?
I guess I’ll just have to rough it until you get something more suitable for me.
–Luna
Puppy Eyes
Are your Humans trying to enforce an unreasonable rule* like “no furry children in the bedroom while the Humans are away at the mysterious place they call ‘work’?”
Time to deploy the Puppy Eyes and a grand Puppy Yawn.
–Stella and Cosmo
*This rule is obviously unreasonable because we have nothing good to lounge on in our living room given that we have eaten all of our futon mattresses, our couch, a comfy side chair and a footrest.
Daily Feline Wisdom 