Closed doors are an affront to our dignity as Cats.
I command you to rectify this situation immediately, Human Mommy.
–Lily
Roommates
Living with roommates is no easy thing. For example, sometimes your roomie will want to munch on something super stinky on the couch while you’re trying to watch TV.
Eeeewww, Cosmo, really? I’d move but I was here first.
What’s the matter, Darth? Bully Sticks smell AMAZING! I’ll share it with you if you want.
–Darth Vader and Cosmo
Peekaboo
Peekaboo, annoyingly bright morning sun. I see you.
Now I don’t and that’s much better.
–Lily
Paid Product Placements
Here at sevencatsandcounting, we are not above paid product placements and sponsorship deals.
The keyword here is “paid.”
Hey, Target, you owe me 10 jars of Smarty Cat Organic Catnip for this post.
–Luna
Paleo Diet
What’s this Humans?
Is this a bowl of canned, ground, mass-produced Cat Food?
No, thank you.
In the summer months, I follow a strict, raw food, paleo diet, inspired by my cousins the Lions.
–Finnegan
After Brunch
After a chatty, meow-mosa fueled brunch with your girlfriends, nothing feels as good as a refreshing catnap.
–Lily, Luna and Amber
Dance
To nap is to dance.
Keep moving, keep it interesting, don’t hold any pose too long.
See? Two perfectly executed poses in under a minute.
Imagine what I could do if I were awake!
–Orzo, Guest Contributor, Premier Danseur de Sommeil
Personal Stylist
As a Girl Cat, part of your job is to help your Human Mommy pick out her outfits.
The grey shift is your best bet today, Human Mommy.
–Luna
Goodnight, Love, and Purrs
Why are your eyes running like the Drippy Faucet of Youth, Humans?
The pain is gone, my claws are back, I’m at least 2 pounds of muscle heavier.
What’s with the waterworks, Humans?
I’m as strong and young as my Doppelcatter, though a million, a gazillion times handsomer than he.
(Seriously, how my Doppelcatter gets any girls is a mystery to me.)
Uh-oh, Humans, your eyes are dripping faster, too fast, much faster than my Drippy Faucet of Youth ever dripped.
Chill out, Humans! I’ve got all my teeth and all my whiskers and all my claws. Do you know how much I’ve missed my claws?
I’ve missed my claws A LOT!
I’ll miss you, too, Humans. And the other Cats and even the Woofies.
I’ll especially miss the Little One, even though she pounced on me more than once. If I’d had my claws on me, I would’ve taught her a good lesson then and there.
I’m grateful, too, Humans. I’m grateful you became my servents…er…Humans.
I’m even grateful you took me to the V-E-T when you did.
But most of all I’m grateful for the Drippy Faucet of Youth.
It finally worked. I’m young and whole and vital again.
Goodnight, Love and Purrs,
Mr. Charlie
(Born 2001 or so–crossed the Rainbow Bridge August 3, 2017)
Sharing
Of course I share my bed with the Millenial Kitten Princess. We Cat Queens are nothing if not magnanimous.
No the Princess may not have a pillow.
Magnamity has its limits.
–Queen Amber
Daily Feline Wisdom 