Yet again you have failed to make our bed, Human Mommy.
That will be 5 demerits.
–Lily, Luna, Amber and Quicksilver
No, you may not flip through this binder, Human Mommy.
Dishtowels you say, Human Mommy?
Cat sheets, I say.
I’m right. You’re wrong.
Now go away.
It’s high time for my late afternoon nap.
Peekaboo, annoyingly bright morning sun. I see you.
Now I don’t and that’s much better.
After a chatty, meow-mosa fueled brunch with your girlfriends, nothing feels as good as a refreshing catnap.
–Lily, Luna and Amber
To nap is to dance.
Keep moving, keep it interesting, don’t hold any pose too long.
See? Two perfectly executed poses in under a minute.
Imagine what I could do if I were awake!
–Orzo, Guest Contributor, Premier Danseur de Sommeil
Sure, exercise is good for you but overexertion is dangerous.
Running with scissors is never safe.
Catnapping on top of scissors is totally fine.
Even the best synchronized napping routine can fall apart when the middle Cat forgets to extend his right paw.
Try some freestyle napping to cover up the mistake.
–Darth and Amber
Sometimes you need to be firm with your Humans. For example, your Human Mommy may tell you that she wants to roll onto her side for her afternoon nap.
Tell her no. Remind her that you are comfortably installed on her chest and that it is her duty, her honor, to continue to stroke your head and muzzle until you you tire of her ministrations.
Under no circumstances is she to alter her position and thereby inconvenience you, the Cat.