There’s no such thing as too much fetch!
There is such a thing as just enough fetch to insure that you collapse on the futon to dream of yet more fetch!
–Cosmo
Why Smile?
You have introduced a baby Woofie to my kingdom.
You have encumbered my royal shelf with a bulky camera to spy on said Woofie.
Why would the Sun King smile about any of this?
–Finnegan, the Sun King
Scary Things
Sometimes even the strongest, bravest, seven-pound-and-growing Warrior Puppy Princess gets scared, like when she is taken, against her will, to the dreaded V-E-T.
Just curl up tight in your Human Daddy’s arms. You’re strong, but he’s stronger than you. He doesn’t seem the least bit scared and he’s obviously topped seven pounds.
Human Daddy will keep you safe.
–Xena Warrior Princess
Too Much Space!
Humans, Cosmo is taking up way too much space!
His long lankiness is no excuse for his front paw resting against my tail.
Do something, Humans!
If not, I’ll have to deploy my Murder Mittens!
–Lily
Too big?
What do you mean I’m too big to sit on the back of the couch, Humans? I see the Meowies do it all the time.
Uh-oh! The cushions seem to have collapsed under me.
You may have a point, Humans. Either that or your couch is defective.
–Cosmo
Blockage
Sometimes you will encounter a blockage on your way to a higher position.
If the blockage is named Amber, it’s advisable to look for a detour.
–Luna
Snooze Button
Please hit the snooze button again, Human Mommy, for 5 minutes or 15 minutes or 1 hour or…
…however long it takes to reach the weekend.
–Cosmo
Dirty Dishes
Are you planning on washing these dishes, Humans?
Never mind, I’ll just lick off the good stuff and maybe, accidentally, break the Ginger Cat Mug.
The Ginger had it coming.
He’s looking at me funny.
–Quicksilver
Why oh why?
Why oh why did you get her, Humans?
Why oh why are you making those funny hissy noises and folding back your ears, Uncle Darth?
Okay, bye Uncle Darth! Maybe we can play later?
I hope we can play later!
–Darth Vader and Xena
My Weekend as a Dog
For you Dog Lovers out there, their Royal Highnesses Seamus and Ralph provide a sobering account of being left at home with inferior servants.
Enjoy!
Woofs and Wags, Cosmo, Stella and Xena
